Steve Romeo

I remember the first time I met Steve Romeo.

I was married at the time, and I never came out much...but this was one of the rare occasions that I did. At that time in my life, I always felt "out of the loop", so to speak. The people of "my circle" seemed to be changing all the time, and so did the hangouts. On this particular night, we were heading to McKenzie's Brew House...yet another "new hangout" as far as my uncool, married ass was concerned.

When we got there, everyone decided to head down to the lower level, where the pool tables are. As we reached our destination, I saw Maureen "Mo" McGinley...she was someone that I recognized...NOT one of the new faces that I didn't know. BUT, Mo did have a new face with her on this night. He wasn't someone I had seen before. I turned to one of my friend's and asked "Who's that guy?", they responded "Oh, that's Mo's boyfriend Steve.". Now, I'm going to be honest...all this meant to me was that I was going to have to meet yet another new face, that I was sure wouldn't be around by the next time I actually made it out of the house.
What can I say...I'm a cynical bastard...I admit it.

Within a few minutes after me asking a friend who he was, I remember turning back in the direction in which I last saw him, and RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME, hand already extended in what almost seemed like something out of a movie...was Steve.
"Hey, how's it goin'? I'm Steve Romeo...Mo's boyfriend!!!"
"O...K....I'm Joe McCabe...Mo's friend." I responded, not quite sure what just happened exactly.
"Do you wanna shoot some pool?" He immediately asked.
"Nah...I'm just gonna sit back here and enjoy my drink." I said.

Now, I told you....I'm a cynical bastard, and I honestly wasn't quite sure how to take this burly guy and all his over-friendliness!
Oh c'mon...I told you I'm a jerk sometimes, people!
I'm kinda like an Archie Bunker type, you know....I don't take well to you at first, but eventually I will....well ok, most of the time, anyway.

As I sat at the back wall with my drink, Steve came to talk to me again.
"So how long have you known Mo?" he asked?
"Oh....since around 1990 or so, I guess." I explained.
"Oh....well, we just started seeing each other a few weeks ago. Man, I never thought she would go out with me!" he said.
"Why's that?" I asked.

Now I don't remember what he said he was doing prior to their meeting, it was something about working all day...or doing something outside, but he said the following just as I began sipping my Jack and Coke.

"....so there I was trying to talk to her, all fat, and I SMELLED LIKE A FUCKIN' HOAGIE, BRO!!!"
That, catching me completely off guard, coupled with his slap to my shoulder as he got up to take his turn at the pool table, left me choking on my Jack and Coke.

Self deprecation is right up my alley.
This guy just might be around a while.

The next time I saw Steve, was at a party of a friend named Andy Mitchell. He always had these backyard parties when the weather got warm. Again, being married, I missed most of them, but this one I remember.
Steve was talking to Mo, and he said something close to the following "See how lucky I am, baby? All these guys here wish they were with you, but you're with me."
Mo kinda chuckled, and went off to get a beer or something, and I remember someone saying to him "Christ, dude...you already got her...she's been with you for months, you don't have to lay it on so thick".
And I remember the smile dropping off of Steve's face, and him saying "Huh? Whadda ya, mean?"

I then realized...this guy REALLY meant what he's saying!!!
See, as guys...we watch a lot of cats SAY shit, that they don't mean, and THEY even laugh about it when the woman walks away.
But he wasn't laughing.
He had the look of confusion that I can only imagine a child would have when you tell them there's no Santa Claus.

Mo and Steve were married shortly after that.

The last time I saw Steve Romeo out and about, we hadn't seen each other in quite a while.
I remember a loud "HEEEEEYYYYY, BRO!!!!...What, did you drop off the face of the Earth or something?"
I had since gotten divorced...a divorce that turned inexplicably ugly, and now I was in the middle of a new relationship...so again, I wasn't going out much anymore.

So I said to Steve "Ah..man....I'm seeing someone, ya know? I spend all of my time with her."
He said "Fuck, brother...you must be IN LOVE!!! After the divorce, and now you're RIGHT back into a committed relationship?"
I said "Yeah, man...I am."
Then he said.."Well good, man...I'm glad you're happy again, and you know what this means?....WE NEED TO DO SOME SHOTS ON ME!!!!"
And we did.....and did....and did.

Shortly after that, Steve was diagnosed with cancer.

I'm not telling you this story because Steve Romeo and I were great friends.
We didn't even have each others phone numbers.

I'm telling you this because he was one of THOSE people.
The kind that you can hang out with a few times over the span of several years, but they leave an indelible impression on you. Just like the ones that I was able to vividly recount for you now.

Somehow, I find myself very emotional over the loss of that loud, burly, shot buying, bastard. Maybe it's because he's the first one from my circle of friends to go. Maybe it's because as a father, I can't imagine being him and knowing I was leaving my children behind, and there's nothing I can do to stop it.
Maybe it's because it just doesn't seem right.

But the main reason I'm putting this here, is for a permanent record.
I've seen people who had lost their parent at a young age, and I always thought that it would be nice for them to one day be able to know who their parent was to the people around them. How were they perceived, what did it mean to everyone when they walked into a room, and what was the one memory that encapsulated their parent to the person telling it?

So, I invite you all to use this place to leave your memories of Steve, if you want to.

And to Mo....
I hope you know that we all see you as an absolute soldier, for lack of a better word. I can speak from experience when I say, I have had MANY phone conversations regarding your situation, and EVERYONE has the utmost admiration for you as a wife, a mother, and a friend.
You have been the quintessential example of what a wife is supposed to be to her husband. You stood by Steve through terrible conditions, and exhibited a strength that all of us have said we didn't think we could have.
Steve was right that day in Andy Mitchell's backyard...he was a VERY lucky guy.
I hope you know that.
And I'm sure your children do too.

Rest In Peace, Bro.

It's Time To Close The Internet Down

I think we've officially reached the end.
Nothing good can happen from here....it's all downhill.

Movie Review: Tyson

If you were there in the 80's when it was all happening, Mike Tyson wasn't just an amazing boxer, he was a cultural event. He was like a machine that ran through champions the way a professional fighter would go through "challengers" at your local bar at closing time on a Friday night.
Most of the time, they weren't even fights by what we had come to know from boxing's championship bouts. They were just brutal assaults that were considered "long" if they made it to the third round. The style and impact of the punches he landed, were only seen previously in "Rocky" movies, except no one was taking those kinds of blows for 12 rounds in real life, and then giving a dopey speech about unity in the end.

James Toback's documentary "Tyson" allows the story to told by the one person who can tell it better than anyone else, Mike Tyson himself.

I remember seeing a piece done on Leon Spinks who once made history by beating Muhammad Ali in a decision and becoming the fastest man to ever become World Champion, by winning the title by his eight professional fight.
At the point the piece was done, Spinks was getting up at 5am in the morning to be at "Labor Force" by 6am, so he could get some sort of paying job for the day.
Spinks explained how he felt it was all too much, too fast, and that the boxing world more or less ate him up and spit him out.

Tyson's story is similar in a lot of ways, but Tyson, in my opinion, brings a "rock & roll" aspect to boxing that no one before him ever did.
If you think about it really, Tyson's skill in the late 80's, is only part of his fame. The other part is the over the top insanity that we came to know from Tyson towards the downfall portion of his career.

A downfall that began with a loss to James "Buster" Douglas in 1990.
I will NEVER forget that night. It was just one of the moments that stay with you forever.

Think I'm lying?

Fine...
That night, me and my friend Rob M. went over to Mike G's house to pick him up to go to a party at the house of this guy Mike R.
Now, Mike R. always had parties, because his parents always seemed to be gone. He was awesome in a strange way...not because of his parties, but because he ALWAYS had an unbreakable comb in the back pocket of his jeans, IN WHICH, his button down shirt was ALWAYS tucked into. AND, he once entered a room in which a party was already going on, extended his arms outward like Christ to his Apostles, and said "THE PARTY IS HERE!", to deafening silence.

You see, he really felt he WAS the party.
I think he was the only one who saw things that way.
But I applaud his bravado, and I remember him until this day for that, whereas most others are forgettable.

ANYWAY, so we went to Mike G's to pick him up, but the Tyson vs. Douglas fight was just starting, SO, we decided to watch, assuming it couldn't possibly take long. I mean, none of us had ever heard of Buster Douglas, and we "just wanted to see how badly Tyson was going to beat him down". Needless to say, we got to "The Party's" house WAY later than we thought, and were the bearers of the news that Mike Tyson had just been knocked out by a guy we never heard of. We were looked at, as if we just told them we saw The Pope picking up a she-male prostitute in the Arby's parking lot.
That's how badass Tyson was...NO ONE believed he could lose.

Later in the night, as I'm sure Warrant or something was playing, Mike G. introduced us to his cassette of "Pretty Hate Machine" from Nine Inch Nails....SWEARING it would be "the next big thing".
Silly bastard...what did he know anyway?
I mean....
wait....
um, nevermind.

My point is, I just told you what me, and the people around me were thinking on that night, but in "Tyson", you get to hear what the man himself was thinking, and what happened afterward. Sure, it doesn't contain anything about unbreakable combs, "The Party" arriving, or the impending death of hair bands....but it's technically more important than all of that.
I mean, not to me...but to others, you know?

What I found most interesting about "Tyson", is the journey of a man's life. A man who was once on top of the World, that now seems to acknowledge where he is, and has come to terms with his own story. It's a story you've heard about other fallen stars, but for me, Tyson was more than that. If you were there during his rise, you certainly were there watching his trainwreck of a fall....and for the first time, you get to hear what it was like from his personal perspective....behind the scenes of all the madness.

And yes, there are plenty of "Tyson-isms" throughout...you know, those moments where Tyson mis-speaks and uses a word that kinda throws a monkey wrench into what he's trying to convey?
For instance...he tells a story of the first time he allowed himself to have sex after his rise to the Championship. He ends up at a party, and follows a model into a bathroom, where he says he "performed fellatio on her".

Now...you can tell him what that means, because I'm not going to.

During the same story, he explains how he loves talking to women...how he loves to have a "monologue" with them. I often prefer to just have a monologue with "certain" women too. But I DO love me the intelligent ones. There is NOTHING hotter than a good looking, smart woman, right?

But enough of all that. If you have any interest in Mike Tyson...you MUST see this film. It's the best recounting of his story that you'll ever hear, and it was great to look back on that great time in boxing, AND what will most likely be the LAST great hero in boxing.

The Art Of Skullduggery.
You'll understand after you watch the film.

The Trailer

Seriously, Japan....WTF?

All I can gather from this is that Inochi is either supposed to be an alien, or he's Japan's version of Rocky Dennis. In either case, I don't recall E.T. or Rocky ever sporting wood when thinking about underage girls. I mean, even when Cher bought Rocky that hooker for his birthday, he didn't get wood, and that was the perfect occasion for something like that....unless Rocky was smart enough at that age to realize that a hooker can give you the gift that keeps on giving, if you know what I mean.

But, Rocky just wanted to talk to the hooker...and why?

Because when you're telling a story like that...about an outcast...you don't want him to be a sexual deviant. The character becomes far less endearing if he's running around watching young girls getting undressed like some peeping tom, with a head that looks like an allergic reaction.
People don't sympathize with characters like that...unless you're one of these creeps that I see on the internet, posting Japanese Hentai porn on your friend's Myspace page.
And what's with THAT while we're at it????
I swear, some of you guys are really jacked up...and that's coming from ME!

But I mean, could you imagine if "Mask" featured a Rocky, running around...banging hookers, doing blow, and peeping into the girl's locker room?

Wait...on second thought....that movie would be a whole 'nother level of AWESOME if it had been done that way. Him and Gar getting into bar fights, and Gar holding a guy while wearing his "Moustache Rides" t-shirt, yelling "Hey Rock...give him the headbutt!" and everyone in the bar knowing that it spelled doom for the guy, because it's like getting hit with a cinder block.

By the way...if you ever watch the "Mask" DVD, there's a deleted scene that director Peter Bogdanovich wanted to leave in, but the studio made him remove. It features Cher and Rocky singing "Little Egypt" for all the other bikers around a campfire... and I SWEAR, it's a scene crafted by Satan himself. If I die and go to Hell, this scene will playing on a thousand foot screen in front of me for all Eternity.

Anyway, Japan...you seriously need to chill the f**k out with some of this shit.

Hammy McCheese Shows You How He Gets Down!

Now ok, I used to be a disgusting fat body, as Gunnery Sgt. Hartman would say....I mean, nothing like this cat...but I LOVED me some food back in the day.
But what would have NEVER occurred to me back then, would have been to film myself sucking in food like I was a Hoover, and then putting it on the internet for all to see. Mostly because there was no internet back then...it was the 80's...but more so because I'm extremely self conscious.
That's what I don't get about stuff like this...you KNOW he gets clowned by people just for being so big...but now it's as if he's saying "I'll show you just how fat I can BE!!!!"
I don't understand a lot of what I see on YouTool.

The thing that is so mesmerizing about this particular video to me, is how he becomes winded after simply lifting up the empty bag of Pizza Rolls, and then becomes increasingly winded with each roll he has to lift to his mouth thereafter.

By the way, I HATE Pizza Rolls...they taste nasty, and would always get too hot on the inside and burn the shit out of my mouth....they're only good for late night drunk food.
Regardless, I don't think Butter The Hutt actually can feel pain though, so it's cool if they burn his mouth.

I love how in the end, he washes it down with Smirnoff Ice, and then says "It wasn't a fast as I was hoping for".
REALLY?
You ingested those things like it was your F'N job, man!

Anyway...dig....