Announcement: I Need Your Attention!

Since Pastor Terry Jones chickened out and decided not to stage his book burning, I truly believe that something needs to be done to show our protest, as Americans. In this turbulent age we find ourselves living in, we as Americans can not afford to just sit by on the sidelines and do nothing. We must fight back! We must stand up for ourselves and secure our sacred landmarks, preserve our culture -- our very way of life.

With that in mind, I am hereby announcing that I will be holding a book burning at my home in Milford Delaware in my backyard fire pit this Saturday, September 18th.

It has recently come to my attention that Mad Magazine is headquartered and published in New York City, a mere thirty blocks or so from Ground Zero. This is intolerable. We as Americans can not let this continue. Mad Magazine has been a subversive force in America for more than 50 years. They have taken unwarranted shots at our American political system, our culture, even baseball and apple pie -- the very fabric of our society.



They supported the hippie movement in the 60's; they were against Reagan in the 80's; they continue to support gun control, abortion, stem cell research, ear-marks, high taxes, welfare for the needy, Obama-care -- all things anti-American...(well I'm not really sure about anything in this last paragraph, I really just made all this up).



Do not forget about those Spy vs. Spy bastards. This is like a mini terrorist training manual, where these guys teach us ways to plant bombs and set booby traps, in each and every issue.

Lastly, the final page has some kind of cryptic fold up message that if decrypted properly lays a path for Americas destruction...again, they publish this magazine only thirty or so blocks away from Ground Zero!

So join me in burning as many copies of Mad magazine as we can gather. I have gathered almost a dozen copies and will be accepting donations from local churches, schools, and libraries. I will be holding a press conference later this week to announce my final plans, so stay tuned.

God bless America.