Poor Tiger Woods.

While you all sit waiting for Tiger to confess about his extra-marital activities, *I* have learned what REALLY happened between Tiger and his "wife".
It turns out, Tiger Woods was forced by the Illuminati, into helping Michael Jackson scam millions in insurance money, by faking his own death.
Oh, and he's having a queermosexual affair with him too.
NTTATWWT.

See, YOU have all been fooled by a bottle of peroxide...but not me!
You can't pull the wool over my eyes, Tiger!!

Want proof?
FINE!!!


Tell me that's not Michael Jackson!!!!!
I dare you!!

AND, just look at Tiger's face....

"Why the hell did I get myself involved with this shit?"
"I ain't even attracted to this motherfucker."
"I need to CHEAT!"

So, as you can see, Tiger didn't cheat on his wife, he cheated on Michael Jackson.
And who WOULDN'T cheat on Michael Jackson??

On behalf of all of America, I apologize to you Mr. Woods.