Saying Goodbye To A Shit Decade...For The Most Part.

When I look back over the last ten years, I can't help but think what an absolutely miserable decade it was for the most part. It wasn't just terrible for me personally, but it was basically miserable for us all as a nation.

I think history will remember the early 2000's as "The Decade Of Panic".
We rang in 2000 panicking about the dreaded "Y2K" bug. Remember when we were all going to die because computers would stop understanding clocks?
We all waited breathlessly...."WHAT WILL HAPPEN WHEN THE CLOCK STRIKES MIDNIGHT?!?!?"
Turned out....a whole lotta nuthin' is what happened.

Then during the month of August in the Summer of 2001, we were all going to be eaten by sharks.
Remember that?
The whole nation was in a panic because the news constantly told us how sharks were strangely attacking in record numbers at our beaches.
Hell, I think people in the Mid-West were even looking over the shoulders for sharks, and those motherfuckers don't even have an ocean!

A month later, I would have given anything to have only to had sharks to worry about.

From now, until the day they put me in my grave, I will never forget September 11, 2001.

You wanna know the funny/sad thing about that?
September 11 is my Mother's birthday. Strangely, years before 2001, I was able to forget that day from time to time.....making the "Happy Birthday" call at the end of the day, because my work schedule always had me thinking of other things.
But not now.
Not ever again.
And for me...this decade made Layla take on a whole new meaning.

The names Osama Bin Laden and Al Qaeda became part of our lexicon.

In the years that followed that terrible day, we were CONSTANTLY reminded that the "tersts" (Pres. Bush's pronunciation for "terrorists" not mine) were always plotting to kill us.
We were taught that the colors that we once had to learn in kindergarten, now indicated different levels of our impending doom.
We bought plastic and duct tape to protect us from an impending chemical attack, although all scientific indicators told us they would be absolutely useless if such an attack were ever to actually occur.

We went to war.
And we stayed there.
And we have no idea when we will ever leave.
And somehow, that's become a suitable answer.

We saw Daniel Pearl get beheaded.
We also saw Nick Berg get beheaded, reportedly at the hands of Abu Musab al-Zarqawi.
And we saw Nick's father Michael, call for calm, peace, and forgiveness....something I didn't understand at the time.

Madrid.
London.
Bali.
Mumbai.

Kabul.
Baghdad.
Fallujah.
Tehran.

And our terror alert levels...you know, those colors we talked about, went up and down all the time...JUST to make sure we didn't forget we were about to die.

But Al Qaeda wasn't enough.
We were also under attack from birds, cows, and pigs.
Mad Cow was gonna kill us if we ate steak....but bullocks to them, I LOVE me a filet from Sullivan's!!!
The Swine Flu is probably killing you as you read this...whether you know it or not.
But more importantly, even if you do survive the cow and the pig, The Bird flu is currently mutating to one day cause a pandemic.
Pandemic is a word that become a household item during this decade too.

Oh, did I mention the ice caps are melting?
What about the Mayans saying that we're all fucked in 2012?
YOU ARE GOING TO DIE!!!
Maybe even right now.
If not now...REALLY soon.

It doesn't matter really, because this last decade probably has you broke anyway.
Maybe you've lost your job....or worse, your home....or your business.
Hopefully, nothing really changed for you.....I can't say the same.

In this decade, I watched almost everyone I knew that was married, get divorced....myself included. Through that, and a following relationship, I witnessed how awful and pathetic people can be.

I also learned a few things about how inept AND corrupt police departments can be.
That's something else that will stay with me.
If you disagree with me, it's because you've never been on the receiving end of their bullshit.
Trust me, I used to think like you....ask the "bleeding heart liberals" I used to fight tooth and nail with.

I watched my business, which once kept me busy year round, struggle to maintain any sort of full schedule at all. I've listened to my blue collar brothers echo the same sentiments that I express, and I see the look in their eyes. It's a look of bewilderment and sadness. They're confused...not able to understand what happened.
There's something about men like that...like me....we always took pride in the hard work we did, and we were always ready for more....it's what we did. Talking about our schedules was almost like veterans showing off battle scars.
But now it was gone...and we couldn't go to work anymore.
What do you do, when all you've known for 20 years goes away?

But for us....it's still there...sort of.
There's still a heartbeat, albeit faint.
Many others weren't so fortunate. Factories...companies...simply closed their doors forever.
For some, a lifetime of loyalty was wiped away in the blink of an eye.

But in the tail end of all that mess, I also reconnected with a lot of great people through the magic of Facebook.
I was again goofing with the girl who used to sit with me in art class, and the guy who stole my thunder there! (You WILL pay one day, Cobb!!)
The girl I annoyed the hell out of with my romantic advances during my Southern Comfort haze in the early 90's, was willing to speak to me again, and now I saw her be an amazing mother to her daughter in her life today.
I again had laughs with the crazy curly haired bastard that jumped out of the 2nd floor window in high school, and who now is bringing the Lotus Technique to the masses.
Then...the girl who despite Darren's claims, I never had sex with in my Grand Prix...BUT, she did steal my Queensryche disc for a year or so.
Hell, I even reconnected with someone I hadn't seen since I was around 7, and we were both able to have a laugh or two about this cat Walter that we knew back then.

All of those people mean a lot to me. I believe that everyone you ever spent time with, is a part of your fabric...that they in whatever way, comprise who you are as a human being.
So I'm happy that I get to see them again...who they are....what they do...and their children.

And I met new people....and have had some GREAT times with them all...even that creepy fucker, Dan, and that Haus Frau, Stephanie.
HA!

I became friends with Reverend Bob Levy from the Howard Stern Show during this decade, through him, met Artie Lange (On the night of the now infamous Delaware show), High Pitch Eric, Beetlejuice, Joey Boots, Jim Florentine, Twitchels, Shuli, Sal Governale, Richard Christie, Dan The Song Parody Man, Fred The Elephant Boy, Kenneth Keith Kallenbach, Ms. Amputee, Angry Black (Shelly is cool as shit, I don't care WHAT you fucks say), Jim Norton, and The Blue Meanie from E.C. FUCKIN' W.!
Oh, and superstar Chris McDevitt.

I have had some of the biggest laughs of my life during these times, and the days of Bob's website.

I also found myself in a new relationship during the later part of this year.
And for the first time in a really long time, maybe ever, I think I know what it means to have someone that is completely selfless. Someone who considers other people, as much as they consider them self....and sometimes even more so. No games...No lies....no shady bullshit....just simplicity and kindness, and it couldn't have come at a better time in my life.

Through it all....I'm a VERY lucky guy.

But that said, there was a lot in this decade that I can't wait to wash away....events, things, and people that I hope to soon forget.
At the same time, I hope those people have learned lessons through all of this....and I hope they improve. I hope they learn what's truly important in life, and grow up...for lack of a better term.
Because every time you focus energy on evil and negativity....you lose.
Period.

In closing, it just seems that people have felt an incredible amount of stress and pain in this last decade....let tomorrow night be the end of that.

Let's start it all over...correctly...in 2010.