For the last presidential election, I waited 2 hours in line on election day to cast a vote for John Kerry...A vote that didn't count, because Texas is so full of slack-jawed, big-haired, gun-toting, church-going simpletons who vote Republican because the church tells them to protest abortion, gay rights, and stem-cell research. But I had to cast that vote. I wanted the world to know that not everyone in Texas is a spandex-wearing retard.
I learned my lesson. This year, I voted early. Now I am free to jog, swim, go horseback riding, rollerskate... everything the Tampax box says I can do. Life is good.
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